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tv   The Daily Show With Jon Stewart  Comedy Central  July 14, 2011 1:00pm-1:30pm PDT

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-- captions by vitac -- >> july 13, 2011 from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is "the daily show" with jon stewart. ["daily show" theme song playing] [cheers and applause] captioning sponsored by comedy central >> jon: welcome to "the daily show". my name is jon stewart. we've got a good one for you tonight. my guest tonight author matthew richardson. he is author of a book about fannie mae and freddy imagine and -- freddie mac and why the two shu never have gotten married. republican michel bachmann has
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surged above president obama. the key to the success progrowth agenda, adherence to the founding fathers principles and something special. >> analysts say her uncompromising views on homosexuality are one of big reasons she's gaining traction in iowa. >> jon: what? why would iowans be so concerned about what happens three inches below the corn belt? [laughter] since the iowa supreme court legalized same-sex marriage in 2009 they've noticed real changes in the state's cash crop! [laughter] yes, their worst fears corn destroyed by a (bleep) playing. [laughter] a -- (bleep) plague. movie about iowa field of -- if you build it they will -- you
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know. [laughter] it's no surprising the message is resonating to conservatives there. unless you think she's pandering rest april sured she's be on this message for years. >> if you are involved in the gay and lesbian lifestyle it's bondage. it's personal bondage, personal despair and enslavement. that's why it's so dangerous. it's a sad life. it's part of satan to say this is gay. it's anything but gay. >> jon: if i were to use a word for their lifestyle i'd say it was queer. what they took that word, too? oh, god. those (bleep). they've got that one, too? [laughter] representative bachmann doesn't just talk the talk. she and her husband walk the walk. dr. bachmann runs a christian counseling term that practices repaira active therapy or pray
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the gay away. why he denies it some focialer patients remember things differently. >> his path for my therapy would be to read the bible and pray that -- to god that i would no longer be gay. >> if none after this worked, ramirez says the counselor had another idea. >> he suggested to you, what? >> not acting out on my same-sex attractions and living a life of sell basis. -- sell sel de la terre -- celid celibacy. >> jon: he always prescribed a medical cocktail with a side efks of a four hour erection and i wasn't going to let that go away. we haven't heard from the man himself dr. bachmann seen here
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dancing with his wife. wait a minute, can we come back here? that is michele bachmann's husband? [laughter] that is -- that is the guy teaching people not to be gay? seriously? is he -- is that the guy -- [cheers and applause] is he -- is he teaching people not to be gay or is like the green mile guy and just absorbing it all? no, no, i'm not going there. don't -- don't go there, jon. just repress it. even though you are feeling a deep desire to comically exploit the fact that this man is an izod shirt away from being the gay character on "modern family." of course one of them is just a
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straight man pretending to be gay. don't do that, jon! just because dr. bachmann's therapy to cure gayness does real damage to real people and he is seemingly curing them so you can hoard all the gayness for himself -- [laughter] -- that is no reason to let your primal urge to ridicule this seemingç hypocrisy out. like a light switch, turn it off! the feeling will pass. the feeling -- all right. you know what? everyone looks gayer when they are dancing anyway. let's just hear what he has to say. >> what do you say when your teenager says she's gay? >> there's that curiosity but again we like -- you know, it is as if we have to understand barbarians need to be educated.
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they need be disciplined. [cheers and applause] [laughter] >> jon: really? first of all gay teenagers are barbarians who need be educated you mm -- suppress it. discipline. even though i think this man's views are terrible and he dances and sounds not only gay but centersquare gay, i'm -- you know what, i realize this is bigger than i am. i can't fight this on my own. i need a higher power someone who has been through this, who understands my struggles. i wish that someone could -- >> it's going to be okay, jon. [cheers and applause] ç
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[cheers and applause] >> jon: sorry. thank you. i think they have uconn fused with a different jerry but i'm glad you are here. it's my comedy repression they are profit. >> you are having trouble, jon. you are having that urge to ridicule again, aren't you? >> jon: yes, presidential candidates husband trying to cure gay people while himself -- >> mmmmm hmm. okay. >> jon: take a look. >> wow.
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okay. i'm coming in. >> jon: thank you, i appreciate that. [cheers and applause] jon, you are going to be okay. you need to get it out here. what is your body wanting you to say? >> jon: i don't know something like he's so gay he calls top gun that volleyball movie. oh, my gosh! wow. >> no, no. >> jon: wow! >> no. >> jon: i needed that. i needed that. >> you're welcome. >> jon: thank you. >> you're welcome. >> jon: though that was a little harder than in rehearsal and it was more on the eye than i thought it was going to be. >> i don't believe in half measures and i don't know how to fake slap anyway. >> jon: that's going to leave
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a mark. just because this guy runs a therapy practice that perpetrates a terrible so shiite al crime on gay people itç doesn't mean i should give. in we talked about in this group, jon. comedy is a choice. you weren't born this way. >> jon: i know. i know that. >> you understand? >> jon: i do know that. >> you can resist it. you must resist it. >> jon: it's so hard jerry. >> instead of going for the cheap gay joke try watching the footage. make astute observations. he's a big man. he is dancing. what kind of dance is he doing? >> jon: it's called the the shag. that's a funny name. he has a funny name. >> jon: marcus bachmann y is that funny? >> bachmann? is that a classical music superhero, bachmann?
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you see, you see? this is say target-rich environment. i can't believe you get emmys for this crap. [laughter] >> jon: have you heard his voice. did you hear anything about his voice. it's like hitting off a tee. listen. >> there's that curiosity but again we like -- you know, it's as if we have to understand barbarians need to be educated. >> okay, so it's a funny tone. he has a funny tone. you go deeper than that. the tone is cheap. you see me getting laughs? this is the way that i talk. >> jon: yes, i see you getting laughs. >> no, they are not laughing. this is my natural tone. >> jon: just now your tone it's a funny tone. >> no, no, this is not a tone. >> jon: that's a tone. >> no tone! >> jon: aren't you ever
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tempted by this stuff? >> of course. i'd love to sayç dr. marcus bachmann buys braying paper towels for the packaging. i have that in me. >> jon: i know. >> or he's so gay richard simmons tells him tone it down. >> jon: or that he (bleep)s pinkberry. >> oh, no! no! that was for going blue. don't work the blue. >> jon: it's better if -- >> your by the bit. [laughter] >> jon: i'll do better. i'll try harder. thank you for being here. >> good man. remember no matter how much a comedy home run someone's stereo typical behavior may be. you have to say focusing. this say nightly news par i did program not a gay dancing
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adjustment seminar. >> jon: i know. >> i'm needed elsewhere don nickles is about to get a food delivery by a man who 7o%
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[cheers and applause] >> jon: good news. what is happening? [cheers and applause] we've still got -- great news we
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still 45 minutes to take part in one of america's proudest traditions. >> an old favorite being celebrated today. it's national french fry day. >> jon: national french fry day! time tone joy the golden crisps that we enjoy. it's followed tomorrow by nationally loose bowel movement day. >> every state but one colorado now have obesity rates over 20%. a dozen states mostly in the south have even topped 30%. >> those numbers are astounding. it's just -- it's huge. it's a huge signal. >> jon: i don't know if it's a huge signal. a built for comfort signal. here is how it's gotten so bad so fast. just 20 years ago not a single state had an obesity rate above
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50%. today 38 states are above 258%. meaning america's only growth industry is growth. >> chalk it up to big portions and couch potatoes. >> we're eating less nutrition food. >> how about the bacon nateor double kneel weighs in at 2332 calories. >> jon: that's the problem we've weaponnized our food. isn't there a comprehensible theory that makes it sound like it's not our fault. >> think obesity will turn out to be environmental related. i think the peptide composition of people has changed. i think there's really interesting unpublished research -- [laughter]ççó >> jon: are you saying it's us eating environment peptide mutation crunch that is causing this? we either mend our double down
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ways or we end up so obese we stop reproducing because we can't locate our genitals. i think it takes a new generation of americans. >> at more than 16 pounds michael brown could be the largest baby born in texas. >> jon: we're going need a bi [cheers and applause]
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>> jon: welcome back. my guest tonight professor at new york university's stern school of business, his new book which he coauthored is called "guaranteed to fail fannie mae, freddie mac and the debacle of mortgage finance." please welcome to the program matthew richardson.
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sir -- [cheers and applause] thanks for being here. >> feels good to be here. >> jon: the book is called guaranteed to fail. it feels like they haven't gotten a tremendous amount of attention as far as our entire mortgage debacle and crashing of the echmm. [laughter] what is your feeling -- are they primarily responsible for this collapse? partially? >> yes. i think there should be tremendous outrage at the mortgage finance system. fannie and freddie were smack in the middle of this. you took the two firms with public government backing. they went from just a little bitty players in the early 1980's to at the time of the crisis they owned 50% of mortgage market, $5 trillion of mortgage debt at risk with
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little capital underneath it and we're paying for it. you're paying for it. i'm paying for it. the audience is paying for it. >> jon: the idea is that the trick they were pulling was they go to congress and say, don't worry you're not on the hook for this. and they would go to wall street and say don't worry congress will pay if this goes south. >> that's exactly correct. they were a private firm. they make the profits but the rest was borne by the taxpayer, again, all of us, you combine those together it's a nasty mix. >> jon: how do they privatize profit. i'm curious as to how profit gets privatized and losses get socialized. how does that seem to work? >> they're guaranteed to fail. they have no capital underneath them. they control a huge amount of mortgage market. if things go well which they did for ten years, they are rating the money -- >> jon: who are the
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shareholders is that us? >> the people that bought stock in fannie and freddie. if you bought that stock -- >> jon: you have to own their stock? >> that's right. >> jon: why were they allowed to -- i understand it is in many respects a noble endeavor to help people own theirijis it n? isn't there value to that? >> we subsidized housing sox we got people to borrow more than they could afford to buy houses bigger than they tphaoefpld it's great when everything is going up and when the pyramid begins to collapse you feel the pain. >> jon: would we have felt the same pain. why was fannie and freddy allowed to buy into the derive actives market. why did they get into that business? >> they were simple institutions they bought simple mortgage backed supreme courts and guarantee the default risk on mortgages. your point about the mortgage
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securities market is well taken. we describe it as a race to the bottom. on the one hand you have fannie mae, freddie mac we call it godzilla. you have the banks we call king congress. we want the reader to envision they are looking at downtown tokyo look the at godzilla and king kong battling it out. you have to deal with both and the large institutions. >> jon: when godzilla and king kong are attacked in tokyo is there a regulatory alive that could zap them with a gamma ray? or how do you battle that type of -- it strikes me as, if we're backing them and backing the private mortgage insurers who are we not becoming and how could we as the american public
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have won in the first place. >> once you made them king÷ú kog and godzilla there's nothing you can do. you have to prevent them from becoming that. >> jon: do you have faith there can be an aggressive streamline, not cumbersome bureaucracy, regulatory regime that could control these things or is it politcally not feasible? >> i don't know about the politics. in the book we have a three-stage plan to get from where we are now to where we want to be. first we stop messing around and wind down fanny and freddie. second we need to wean mortgage finance off the government. you can't do it cold turkey. you have to do it gradually. our plan takes a decade to do that. >> jon: we'll be here then. if they fight for a decade that should be all right. we're all going to die! [laughter]
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>> it's been three years we haven't done anything. you have to address it at some point. you would hope a private mortgage finance system well functioning. you have to have it well regulated and if you have that you have a much better functioning economy afterwards. >> jon: one word yes or no is that -- there any possibility in this universe that that gets done? >> 50/50. >> jon: "guaranteed to fail" it's really disturbing. get it.
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[cheers and applause] >> jon: that's our show. join us tomorrow night at 11:00. here it is your moment of zen. >> first lady michelle was seen ordering a cheesebugger, fries captioning sponsored by comedy central captioned by media access group at wgbh